Boy, I'm talking about some serious stuff on this blog, now, aren't I? I guess to me, a blog is something to get thoughts out to people I don't know. Twitter and facebook is for people I do know, my journal is for me, but a blog...a blog is for everyone who cares to read.
Today my university put up a white board with markers available to the public with this question at the top: "Do you think that today's Christian World view inhibits sexuality?"
What a question, huh? The board is now scrawled with numerous answers, both for and against. There are quotes from the bible with full citations and there are also crude drawings of two people having a go on the side of the whiteboard.
People passing by are fascinated and partially disgusted. Questions like these are never taken lightly, no matter what you say. Some people do not take it seriously, while others take it too seriously. Who's to say who's wrong? No one. But, since there isn't much room on the board anymore, here are my thoughts:
I am not religious. My father has a stern belief that if you are born, you are not entitled to believe anything someone else tells you to. Basically, if you don't remember choosing your religion, my father says that it's therefore false. He believes that if you have a child, you should educate them without a religious point of view, but you should also educate them with all of the religious point of views. Children should not be pressured to believe in God if they are not ready, and they should not be forced to hate God just because someone else says so. When they are old enough, they may choose the religion they would like to follow, and if not, they will not pertain to anything.
This is my situation. My parents were both brought up Christian (my mother more Roman Catholic) but I've never gone to church. I've been inside churches, but never for sermons, just to admire the architecture. I've been in Buddhist temples for similar reasons, and even have learned how to perform some rights to the departed and such. I find it fascinating.
But at the same time, I do not believe in any of it, nor am I interested in believing any of it.
This is not to say that I am atheist. I've heard the logic recently, that by being a person that believes there is no God, you do believe, therefore you have a religion. Your religion is just that there is no God or over-ruling force, and that we control our own lives. This logic may sound silly to some, but I kind of like it. The extreme atheists I know know more about religion than most religious people just to go against them. And some extreme atheists are far enough to try and "preach" to religious people that they are wrong and should not believe in God...
Far-fetched stretch, but there you have it.
In my point of view, however, I am not an atheist. Though I do not side with any God or book or church, I am completely accepting of anyone with a religion. In fact, I'm quite fascinated by people with faith. People sometimes have faith simply to ease their minds at night, and who am I to take that away from them? It's certainly not my business who they decide rules the world. However, it is my business when they come into my business and say that I am wrong for being who I am.
To me, it's perfect logic.
Yes, I've prayed. But not to God. Just to...I don't know, the air? Please, let me pass this test. Please, let me get a boyfriend, those type of wishes I've definitely chanted at some time in the past, but never to anyone in particular. It was just to get the thoughts out so my head wouldn't explode. Similar to this blog, I suppose. I know none of my friends would like to hear me complaining and wishing for things that seem unreasonable at the time, so I just say it to the open air.
And yet, to me, whether you believe or not believe, it's your business and what will happen to you will happen. Hm, that sounds confusing. How about an example?
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This is an example from a book called On a Pale Horse by Piers Anthony. There is a scene that is laid out as such:
A man is an atheist and is committing suicide by slitting his wrists and laying in a bathtub full of warm water to slowly bleed out. Death, yes, the Grim Reaper himself shows up and plans to take his soul. However, even though Death is right next to him, with full skeleton-body and scythe, the man claims that he does not have a soul and does not believe in the afterlife.
Death is right in front of him. The man feels his face, which is dry bone, and Death is telling him that no, actually, religious people were right. There is a God, and there is a Satan. If I take your soul once you die, you will go to Heaven, Hell or Purgatory depending on the levels of sin upon your soul. And yet, the man denies it all.
Eventually, as the man dies of his slow-bleeding death, Death gives up on trying to convince him of the truth and reaches out for his soul. He peels it out of his body, but before he can package it away, it disintegrates into dust.
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This example was a huge impact on my outlook on life. If you believe it, it will happen to you. It doesn't matter whether God actually exists or not, if you don't believe in him, you won't go to Heaven. You won't go to Hell, either. You'll just die.
So then, I always thought, where does that leave me? I've never had an opinion on religion. People who are religious can stay religious, I could care less. Those who are atheists are fine, I don't care about them. The only time I do, like I said before is if they are physically in my business.
I do not consider myself to be agnostic, either. To me, being agnostic means you are questioning the existance of God, which I suppose you could say I am, but I don't believe I am. I don't know whether God exists or not, that is true, but that also doesn't matter. He exists for those who believe him, right? Isn't that what Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy says?
"'I refuse to prove that I exist,' says God, 'for proof denies faith, and without faith I am nothing.'"
I can live with that. Though the book continues with claiming that the Babel fish destroys God because it's a dead give-away that he exists, I won't get into that.
I guess my summary doesn't solve much...but I am not agnostic, and I am not atheist, and I am also not religious. I am...
Neutral?
And as for the whiteboard, with the question about the sexuality, I definitely don't want to get into that right now. I think my brain needs a rest after reading some of the things other people wrote on the board.
